Most of us have had that dream. You know the one. Okay, pervs, minds out the muck! The one in which you are back in time and in a situation and you're now older (and hopefully) wiser and everyone else is still at the same stage of life in the past. And you say with your dream voice "Holy crap, I know how to handle this/what to do/what not to do/fill-in-the-blank! I know what is right/what will make me a better person/what will not tarnish me/fill-in-the-blank!" And you do it and it makes you soar. I always end up flying in those dreams, but hey, that's just me. So as I round out my journey out West, I thought of this recurring dream. And it makes me soar.
Here, I have experienced beauty and adventure. Solitude and friendship. Discovery and learning. I had the opportunity to step away from a somewhat chaotic (albeit great) life and was able to become centered. It felt as if I was one of those magnet paperclip gadgets and all my paperclips were strewn around and I couldn't seem to attract them to the place they were supposed to be. But then the magnet was replaced with a new one. And those paperclips couldn't help but be attracted to the re-magnetized gadget. And they moved to the center. I became centered.
So now, I head back to a place I've been before, both geographically and figuratively. And I've missed both terribly - the region, my daughter, beloved dogs and the proximity of family and friends. I go back as a very different person. Not just from the latest adventure out West, but from a long progression of realizations and changes that have been occurring for some years. Change is inevitable and sometimes a couple of the paperclips will escape, but let me tell you something, honey... my magnet is strong. And I have become older and wiser - I have forgiven myself for the fill-in-the blanks - so the aforementioned dream is now a reality for me. With strength and the occasional snippet of solitude, comes serenity. I found it and I'm keeping it.
This is a Doing What I Know.
No comments:
Post a Comment