A Lizard's Thicket

I really have no idea why this place got it's name nor do I understand what it means.  I know what a "lizard" is and that a "thicket" is a dense group of trees and/or bushes - apparently, the creators of Lizard's Thicket are comparing their patrons to a "lizard" and their establishment to a "thicket" and people gather there to eat.  For those not familiar with the Columbia, SC area, this is a southern cooking restaurant chain.  But my story is not about that.

Unfortunately, I was the recipient of whatever crap is going around the country right now and I have felt like the aforementioned for a week.  When I am sick, I crave bad food - so I placed a to-go order at Lizard's Thicket for some fried chicken and mac n' cheese.  I felt horrible and looked worse, so my plan was to walk in, pay and leave.  But because God likes to play tricks sometimes, they couldn't find my order and I had to sit and wait.  I'll give you an image, sensory and visual - didn't bathe that day, hair in tufts sticking out haphazardly from my ponytail, red nose and eyes AND (I do not jest here) snot on the front of my sweatshirt.  I was horrendous.

So even though I wanted to poke the cashier's eyeballs out, I smiled, re-ordered and sat down to wait.  Must have been the effects of the cold meds.  Another patron waiting for his food started a conversation - obviously he felt sorry for me as everyone else was keeping their distance.  He got his food before me, and I'll be damned if this gentleman didn't ask me "if I had a man in my life" and "if not, I would like to take you out for a real dinner."  He went on to say that not only was I "beautiful" (okay, now we're pushing it, buddy) but that "obviously I was not feeling well and you handled the situation with your order not being ready with grace and kindness."  (That one, I'll take.) 


Most likely, I will not use the phone number provided to me - not because he wasn't a handsome man, but let's face it, we can pretty much determine a level of attraction within the first few minutes of meeting someone.  I know that's not always the case, but I did not feel the "zing" - again, may have been the cold meds.  In addition to the fact that this man has got to have some kind of crazy in him to try and pick me up at a Lizard's Thicket when I looked like a homeless person, straight from the streets.  However, I think this guy deserves some kudos and I wish more men were willing to take a chance and approach us - it takes gumption and it does make us women feel good.  Unless it turns to stalking, and then not so much.

So this is a Doing What I Know - our beauty resonates from within and overtakes the ugly that may be happening on the outside on that particular day.  If nothing else, I will call this man and tell him I appreciate him for recognizing that.

The Open Road

Though one of my absolute favorite things to do in life is travel, this is not a writing about hitting The Open Road - not like Bob Segar would do it, anyway.  When I am able, that's how I'm going to hit it - Bob's piano playing while my hair is flying in the wind, glass of wine in one hand and the other wrapped around some hunk's waist (obviously, I'm not driving the motorcycle).  Not knowing where I'm going, only knowing where I've been...

ANYWAY, these are thoughts of where I stand in life today.  It's frightening, enlightening, exasperating, exciting and sometimes, let's face it, disorienting.  The Open Road is long and wide and traverses many landscapes - some of the terrain rough and tumultuous, some of it rolling and lush, and then there's the in-between.  I've experienced it all and I strive to make the hikes that remain in my lifetime #2 of the 3.  By this point in my life, I've gotten in my own way, stepped aside and am now allowing myself to move forward in fluid motion.  I'm not foolish, I know there will be bumps in the road, but I'm ecstatic to report that at least when I see those bumps, I can say "Um, hey there Lady, remember when you decided to run over that same bump with full force a couple of (days, weeks, months, years, insert whatever applies) ago?  Let's choose to roll our wheels around that sucker, okay?"

The openness of what lies before me is liberating and sometimes overwhelming.  I am so thankful to have the family and friends that I do - they hold my ropes as I belay down and over this terrain.  I believe we all do that for one another.  And although I haven't quite discovered the perfect route to my destination, I am looking at the street sign for The Open Road at this very moment, and I know this is the point at which I'm going to start.  I hear the piano playing...

So, I must dub this entry as all three Doings, me thinks.  And we'll just have to see what kinds of Doings the Open Road generates.

E-Squared

I have a new gynecologist and I'm going to say it - I just love him!  He spent years delivering babies and now just concentrates on us Ladies who need help with their estrogen.  Dr. Hutch is an Estrogen Expert, so I have dubbed him E-Squared.  Not only does he make me feel like I'm not crazy for sometimes wanting to bite nails in half, he also has an aesthetics practice!  So, Monday through Wednesday, I can see Dr. Hutch for any meds I may need - he has introduced me to Estrogen cream, which not only makes those of us in pre-menopause feel awesome, but is great for wrinkles and those brown spots.  Who knew?  Thursdays, I can see him for a Botox lift.  Fridays, I hope the man takes the day off.  He deserves it.  Anyway, he is my hero - a man who brought little lives into the world and makes we women feel sane and beautiful.  If he were 20 years younger and I could confirm that he is single, I'd ask him on a date.

So my first visit to Dr. Hutch was for the beautification and we got to talking about pre-menopause, estrogen, birth control and the like.  While discussing the BC issue, we touched upon the sexual activity issue - to which I honestly replied that since I am not currently dating any hunks (or anyone for that matter) and it's not a real concern, but may want to make some changes with what I put in my body.  Meaning birth control drugs, but I suppose that applies to any future hunks too.  I'll just leave it at that for the risk of getting WAY too personal.  Then we discussed my age and the likelihood of a pregnancy (which I have no desire to have one of, by the way) and Dr. Hutch said something to the effect of "Well, you're not having sex, so why even worry about taking any birth control?"  Thankfully, I was in a great mood that day, so E-Squared was spared my poking his eyeballs out.  I replied to him that "I am 44 years old, not 84 and I certainly plan on having sex again - hopefully sooner rather than later - and ongoing for years to come!"  Pun intended.  We had a good laugh and his nurse had to leave the room and run to the restroom to avoid peeing her pants.

Getting into my 40s has been interesting, to say the least.  I was a young mother when I gave birth and now I'm still a young mom to a 22-year old.  My life is pretty awesome (minus the no hunk in my life situation, but that will change) with its normal stresses, but let me tell you, I feel blessed every day.  And when I forget to feel blessed, I kick myself in the ass to get it back on track.   Life isn't perfect, my body's not perfect and my brain leaves a bit to be desired some days, however, I've got a lot of living left to do and I can't wait to rock it!  Don't put me out to pasture just yet, E-Squared.  And keep that estrogen cream coming...

This is Doing What I Know.

Dogs

These of are the literal, not the figurative sense.  Although, be prepared to see postings of dogs in the figurative sense in the future.

Hopefully, this will reach folks that don't know me, so I feel like I need to introduce myself gradually.  For this post, I will title myself "Dog Lover and Rescuer".  I have learned that I prefer rescuing dogs that are sane and unfortunately, in my experience, that happens less often than not.  Damn it all.  This will also segue into cocktail shopping - which is, by the way a wonderful and dangerous experience - just don't do it while shopping in PetSmart.

My ladies and I love to Cocktail Shop - we have a drink and then we shop.  Then we have another drink and then we shop.  It is one of our favorite things to do and is comparable to nothing else in this God Given world.  It is orgasmic, it is therapeutic, it can be psychotic.  But chick-y mama, is it FUN.  Yes, we all have regrets after an afternoon of Cocktail Shopping, but they are usually short-lived as we can put on the pants and spray ourselves with our new good-smell stuff and the anxiety just dissipates - simply goes away.  This is an entry for a whole other time.  I digress to one of my current situations that can be assimilated to Cocktail Shopping, but in a BAD way.  Very BAD.

I took my daughter to lunch which on the weekends (and let's face it, weekdays) involves having at least 2 cocktails.  I have a stern rule - I do not go out to lunch without consuming 2 glasses of wine.  It's just not worth my time to drive to an establishment otherwise.  SO....  we had been to lunch and I needed to go to PetSmart to get dog food.  It was Pet Adoption Day - Damn It All.  My story is, I walked in for pet food and walked out with a fucking puppy.  And he has been my nemesis ever since.  I wish I could love him, but I cannot.  Let's just suffice to say - holes in back yard, window sills destroyed, couch cushions in fluff, puke/bile/piss everywhere, sick, ruin, ruin, ruin.  Oh, did I mention - he's a pit bull?

This dog was procured (and yes, just because we rescue, does NOT mean free) for my daughter.  She loves big, oaf-y canines that are supposed to protect.  I've learned over the years that I prefer the little pip-squeaks that you can ignore if need be.  I will not live with my daughter forever - as much as I love her.  This dog is accelerating the process, need I say more, in deciding where I will live and what I want to be when I grow up.  I am 44-years old, I am tired and my estrogen level is low.  I've raised a child successfully, a dog from a breeder and a rescue that was almost thrown back to the pack, but I decided to practice a patience I normally don't have.  And thank the good Lord above I did, because I love that little shit.  But this new one....  I wish I could put my arms around him and tell him he's cute and I can get over his neurosis.  Gotta tell ya - it's not happening.

So this is a "Doing What I Thought I Knew" post. I thought saving any animal was the righteous thing to do for everyone.  My blood pressure is proof that it is NOT.

The Three Doings Birth in a Dream

I honestly woke from a dream last night with the words "Doing What I Know" flashing in my head and had every intention of writing it down and of course, fell back asleep.  Then, I had a very vivid dream of waking back up and reaching over to my bedside table to get out pen and paper to write this down, but there was only empty candy wrappers, rubber balls and a wrench of some kind in the drawer, so at this point in the dream, I knew it was just a dream.  I should probably look at my Dream Interpretation book on the contents in the drawer, but not sure I want to know the meaning.  The words kept coming to me in sleep, so I knew they were important.  Do you know those dreams you literally have to WILL yourself to wake from a vision - you can see yourself waking up, but it takes a few times to actually open your eyes?  This is what happened to me and this was the birth of this writing.

I am not an author, but have always enjoyed writing.  Matter of fact, in gradeschool, I won the county Young Author's contest (The Canine Caper - clever, huh?) and had wanted to write a book someday.  My Mom actually still has the framed certificate on the wall.  At this point, I have no idea of how to go about writing a book, but I do know how to create a blog.  So here we are.

This series will be stories, thoughts, experiences about no particular subject matter.  The initial "Doing What I Know" is stemming from where I stand in life personally - as many can relate, it is difficult to describe, but is surrounded by the fact that I've recognized the importance of getting to know who I am at the core and living my life based upon that core.  We will always experience the ebb, flow and changes in life, however I believe most of us question and waver the core that makes us who we are - the good, the bad and the ugly - because an outer-lying being deems us to do so.  Personally, I have done this so much over the years, I KNOW it caused me to get in the way of myself. 

So, I'm going to write for personal therapy and hopefully other's enjoyment (if anyone ever reads this).  At the end of each entry, I'll name it either a 1)"Doing What I Know" 2)"Doing What I Thought I Knew" 3) "Not Knowing What the Hell I was Doing" - i.e. 1)our core, 2) outside of our core, 3) stupidity/ignorance/I couldn't help myself bliss.

This is going to be a helluva experience involving gaffaws, tears and hopefully provoking some thought.  We'll see what happens down the line!